Raising kids – Oh the joy of it….NOT!

I got an e-mail from a buddy of mine about the Christian Youth Center that I am establishing and he stated that due to the state of the world he believes the Lord will probably return soon and my acknowledgement that I will not be here in fifty years is probably academic, but he added that we should keep right on living like the Lord may not come back for another 2000 years and the youth center thing was still a good idea.

According to the Bible he is dead on in his assessment. We are to live our lives as though the Lord could come at any minute, but also realize that God will decide when the time is right for the Rapture and He might delay it for some time to come. I think finding ways to keep kids occupied with Godly wholesome activity is essential to keeping them on track.

My sons and I have enjoyed time together on this vacation and it is especially enjoyable being around my grandkids. We were talking about their lives and how difficult it is for kids to escape the perils of this world as it evolves towards wickedness.

I have a friend in the Keys who is possibly the best father I know and he loves his four kids far beyond most parents. He has them in church every Sunday, takes them camping, fishing, and to the myriad of practices and games of the various sports that they are enrolled in. His wife is a nurse and works odd hours and he cooks for the kids while she is at work and cares for them in every conceivable way. He loves them more than life itself. They go on family vacations and one would think it is all bliss from the sound of it.

His oldest boy is now rebelling in a very serious way. He is drinking heavily, taking drugs, getting tickets and in car wrecks, doing terrible in school and so forth. My friend is frantic. The boy is 16 years old and is out of control and full of bitter rebellion. I tried talking some sense into this kid, but he is insolent and non-receptive. He runs with a bunch of scumbags whose parents let the kids drink and smoke pot and they even participate with them. The Keys is no place to raise kids, but I wonder how different it is elsewhere.

As we looked at our little 3 year old twins and 7 month old grandson we wondered aloud how they might turn out. What might we do to protect them? If there is one thing I would fault my friend in the Keys on is that he is too lenient with his kids. He was raised in an orphanage himself and I think his upbringing was so harsh that he cannot in good conscience discipline his kids in the manner that would prove helpful. This leaves that job primarily to his wife and I’m sorry but it is just not the same as a father administering discipline.

Discipline aside I think the biggest thing is the crowd that his son runs with. In the Keys it is difficult to find kids that are not doing exactly what his son is doing. Drinking and drugging is as common down there as the sun coming up over the emerald green water.

Scummy friends bring kids down faster than any other thing and it pays dividends to know who your kids are hanging out with and to intervene if necessary. In this kid’s case, it might be too late, as my friend cannot seem to stop him from running with this gang of misfits. He has almost conceded that this boy may already be lost and now he is concentrating and working hard towards moving the rest of his family out of the Keys in order that his younger sons do not fall into the same trap as the oldest. The problem is where does he move?

Raising kids with a solid background in reading the Bible and going to church EVERY Sunday and exposing them to Godly friends is a must. Living a transparent life of righteousness and reverence for God yourself is also necessary. (It is difficult to tell your kids not to drink when you have a beer in your hand when you say it.) My friend does not drink and he is a nice guy who is frantic as what to do. I pray for him most every day.

The Bible tells us that the world will continue to get more and wicked right up until the Lord returns. We should all work hard to provide safe havens for children. My kids were raised in church, camped, fished, hunted, water skied, swam, took family vacations and the like and they learned at a young age that one does not have to get drunk or stoned in order to have fun. They entered college and were on their own. I held my breath, but fortunately they survived that test and now face it with their own kids. I don’t envy them.

Kids need places where they can have Godly friends and worship and participate in wholesome activity. Gangs are prevalent in this country because kids have no better place to belong. We need to work hard to ensure that this is not the case by establishing places for Christians to congregate and have clean fun. I urge you again to consider what you can do to ensure this happens. Volunteerism is a great thing. Churches with solid youth programs are a must.

For those of you suffering like my friend and perhaps have a child that has gone astray, perhaps you can receive solace in a long term sense from what King Solomon had to say about raising kids:

Proverbs 2:6
Train up a child
in the way he should go.
And when he is old
he will not depart from it.