Sir Francis Bacon once said, “We read that we should forgive our enemies; but we do not read that we should forgive our friends”. The hurts invoked by friends, (and I would add by family), are without question the most hurtful and thus the most difficult to give up and we should be aware of it.
I have been writing Words for the Day daily for many years and nothing evokes more e-mail responses than when I write about forgiveness. It is obvious to me that more people struggle with this than most things.
Mark Twain said, “Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.” I would have to respectfully disagree. Many of those who I have forgiven for misdeeds against me did not want my forgiveness, nor did they even care. I seriously doubt they smelled any fragrance, but it sure made me sleep better at night.
I have many weaknesses, but I have learned to forgive and I know without a doubt that forgiveness is not so much about the other party as about us. It’s nice to just let it go and quit grinding your teeth throughout the night.
How about you? Has anyone insulted you? Said hurtful things behind your back? Cheated you, (or cheated on you)? Fired you? Promoted someone less deserving than you? Stolen from you? Embarrassed you? Gossiped behind your back?
Blah-blah-blah!
I don’t want to pop anyone’s bubble, but there are no virgins left in the world, (at least in this regard). Wrongs have been committed against you and me and every other soul that has roamed this planet and will continue right up until the day they sing How Great Thou Art, Amazing Grace and Victory in Jesus at our funerals.
The important thing is what we do about these “scums” who have wronged us. According to the Bible we should just forgive them. Listen to Jesus, who just happens to know a little about forgiveness and know that if you refuse to “forgive”, you are doomed to “relive”.
Yes, it is far better to broadly smile, point your nose into the wind and never look back.
OK so you are convinced that you need to forgive, but that person who abused you as a child is dead or in hiding. How do you forgive someone whom you cannot see face to face, or who would spit in your face, (or worse)?
Listen to the Spirit and remember forgiveness is really about what is inside our own hearts.
Mark 11:25
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.