Look…. Hard!

A few weeks ago a friend called and invited my wife and me to go on a dove shoot followed by a dinner, hayrides, skeet shooting, etc. Initially it sounded like great fun, but then came the catch, it was being hosted by a Democrat congressman. At first I thought my buddy was joking, but he was actually serious. I told him that I did not think a hardcore conservative independent voter like me would fit in too nicely with the Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Obama crowd.

He was insistent that this event was being conducted for charity and that I could meet some prominent people in the community and that when I got around to conducting fundraisers at my place for the Honey Lake Plantation Christian Youth Center many of these same folks would probably come.

Hmmm I felt like a hypocrite or more like a prostitute, but I reluctantly accepted the invitation.

It was held yesterday afternoon and when we got there I felt like I had infiltrated an enemy camp. After some polite talk and paying our stiff registration fees, we loaded up to go dove hunting. A long procession of trucks and jeeps followed the guide’s truck and finally we arrived at a large freshly harvested peanut field. The guide told the guys in our party to go right over the hill and spread out and that no one else was hunting over there. When I topped the hill I immediately saw a guy waving at me. My plantation manager, (who I had convinced to accompany me), and I looked at each other and finally worked our way through some briars and thistles to a spot away from the crowd that looked safe. I setup my chair, loaded my gun, and waited for the doves.

The doves never came. I sat there for hour after hour and never saw a dove, nor did I hear the first shot from any of the other fifty suckers surrounding the field.

The mosquitoes and gnats were maddening and the blazing hot sun bore down on me unmercifully. I was wet with sweat and dying of thirst and thinking how badly I wanted a cool bottle of water, but I had none with me. Finally I yelled at the top of my lungs up to my plantation manager, “Hey Robbie, this is a typical Democrat/Obama ploy. We have to give them all our money and we get nothing in return.”

He laughed and shook his head.

“I’m dying down here, you got any water?”

He said no, and then in a few minutes I see a guy coming all of the way from the top of the hill with a bottle of water who had overheard our conversation.

OOPS! I didn’t know my voice carried like that. I just insulted all of those Democrats and they are all armed.

Eventually we realized that no doves would ever come and we went back to headquarters where our wives were awaiting us. Someone had built about fifteen smoky campfires and set hay bales around them. The smoke was being carried by the wind right into where everyone was congregated. My eyes were burning and I felt as though I was fighting forest fires in California. There was an open bar and people were sloshing down beers and mixed drinks. I had a baleful look on my face as I muttered to my (former) friend who invited me, “I wonder if they are trying to smoke out the conservatives with these @#*% fires”.

Just then the congressman began his speech. He introduced about forty of his family members including babies and even his chocolate lab and then he introduced all of the VIP’s and other elected officials in attendance to which he lovingly referred to as his “allies”. I was literally fuming and if it wasn’t so smoky you could have seen steam coming out of my nostrils and ears as I was trying to get my wife to leave. She was not about to leave and told me that they had not even served dinner yet. I glumly walked back to the other side of the campfires to try and escape the smoke. The congressman was still introducing people and had not even begun his long winded speech.

Finally, mercifully, he shut up with the talk and told us to eat. Five hundred people rushed to get in line and we ended up among the last twenty or so at the end of the line. We stood for perhaps thirty minutes and did not move an inch. I glowered at my wife and told her that Robbie and I were leaving and that if she wanted to stay, maybe she could catch a ride with someone. She glowered back but I glowered right back only more vehemently, and she finally reluctantly agreed and we left.

I got home, ate a hot dog, sour pickle, and bowl of chili and went to bed.

I was thinking about this at 3 AM this morning when I arose and I decided my attitude was not good. $105,000 was raised for “The Second Harvest” a very worthwhile organization that gives food to the hungry.

Underneath every dark cloud, (and yes even an, Ughhh, Democratic fundraiser), there is a silver lining. We just need to seek it.

Matthew 7:7
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”