Painful decisions

Yesterday one of my Aunt Betty’s doctors came into the room and was recounting how he was in Sunday school class and someone mentioned that a 75 year old man was mowing his yard and waved at a neighbor and then promptly fell over stone dead from a heart attack.

Without thinking the doctor blurted out, “What a blessing!”

The rest of the class was stunned and aghast that he had said such a thing, until he quickly explained that as a doctor he sees so many patients suffer mightily before passing away, it just seemed like a blessing to him for this man, who had lived to a good old age, would be spared that agony and suddenly be swept into the Lord’s presence without undo suffering.

My Aunt Betty is in grave condition primarily due to pulmonary hypertension which is a fancy word for the veins in her lungs are severely restricted which prevents blood from getting to them whereby it can be oxygenated and sent throughout the body, and because of it she has tremendous difficulty breathing and is suffering. Complicating things, only half her heart is working, and she has an infection, and her kidneys are failing, etc. She is fighting mightily to breathe and it’s taking its toll on her.

The doctor came in and told the family that we have a decision to make. Sooner or later the medications, breathing treatments, and super charge of oxygen they are giving her through her nose is not going to be enough, and in order to keep her alive a tube will have to be inserted down her throat and a ventilator will be necessary. The question was whether or not the family wanted to implement this option, or did we want to just let her go on and die a natural death and be with the Lord.

One factor that had to be considered is that there is nothing more they can do to permanently improve her condition. Her life may be prolonged a little, but the doctors say that, barring some miracle from God, her condition will never improve and indeed will continue to deteriorate.

Perhaps the most vexing issue is Aunt Betty’s strong conviction that God had ordained her to stay alive long enough to take care of my dad until he dies. She has maintained this belief for some thirty years and has said that she promised my mother she would do so.

As the decision was weighed among the family, I did not speak up. I figured my dad and her two daughters were really the ones who had to find peace with this decision. Should they try to keep her alive at all costs, at least until the extended family could get there and say their goodbyes, or should they instruct the doctor not to put her on a ventilator and allow her to go on to glory?

If I had a vote I would choose the latter. I believe that Jesus has relieved her of her vow to take care of dad and has decided to take care of him Himself, (and of course I will assist Him in any way I can).
I don’t want to prolong her suffering one minute longer than necessary.
I believe that Jesus has prepared my Aunt Betty’s mansion and that it is finished and all preparations for her homecoming are now complete. We should be celebrating her faith-filled, wonderful, caring life and not delay her reward for being a faithful servant of Jesus Christ which will soon manifest itself in paradise.

Everyone has varying opinions on these issues and all opinions should be respected, but none more than the patient who is lying in that hospital bed. I have a living will and my relatives should never have to make that decision. Do you have one?

1 Peter 5:10
But the God of all grace, … after that you have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, settle you.